Last weekend I saw “The Vow” . I’d not heard of the film before coming down to Florida. Partly because Dave and I almost never go out to the movies anymore and partly because we watch the vast majority of our yet television from our DVR, we just don’t hear about films unless they are heavily promoted.
The story was of a young couple who lived an artsy lifestyle. She had cut all ties with her family, he had none but her. One night they were in a horrible car accident where she suffered severe head trauma resulting in amnesia. The last four years of her life, including her entire relationship with her husband were wiped from her memory. Her husband, refusing to lose the only family he had, spent months trying to help her remember him and their life together.
I won’t give away the rest of the story, the movie was worth seeing. The reason I’m writing about it is because since seeing this film, I’ve been thinking a good deal about love and commitment.
Falling in love is easy. We do it all the time. We visit a new restaurant, try a new recipe, read a good book, meet a new friend or even see a good movie and we say we “love” them all. Making the commitment to be with any of these things for the rest of our lives is another story.
During the course of any marriage we all tend to suffer from amnesia. At times we forget what it was that made us fall in love with our partners. They seem so different or we are different (or so we think). Without commitment to the relationship there is nothing to keep us from running off to find someone new to fall in love with.
Men often joke about their wives, referring to them as “the old ball end chain”. I’d hate to think of myself in that way. Instead, I think of my commitment to Dave as an anchor and chain, securing him, as he does me, when seas are rough. (Navy wife imagery). We work hard to help each other remember why we fell in love in the first place.
We have had our share of white caps, but for the most part have enjoyed fair winds and following seas. Either one of us walking away during a rough spot would have only made a bad situation worse.
So, on this second day after St. Valentines Day, four months away from our 32nd wedding anniversary, I’m thinking I’m pretty lucky to have found someone not only to commit to but to commit to me as well.
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