The Contented Sole

They say that when the going gets tough, the tough get going.  They don’t say where the tough go though do they?  Well, if I may be so bold, I’d like to suggest that for women at least, when the going gets tough, she should get going to the nail salon for a pedicure.  There seems to be few problems that can’t be helped by thirty minutes or so in the pedicure spa chair.

Such an intoxicating experience, to sit in a massaging recliner with your feet immersed in a mini spa tub, jets pulsing the tired soreness from those poor weary soldiers who literally carry the weight of your world.  And, if that weren’t enough, gentle hands tenderly reach for and caress these poor soles making them feel so good, refreshing them for the next steps of the day as they tote along the “few” extra pounds you’ve added over the years.

After the scrub, massage and coat of fresh color (I chose this shade of lavender shimmer just to reach outside the box.), it’s a short wobble in disposable flip flops and toe separators to the drying fans.  Yesterday I had my Kindle with me to finally finish the last few chapters of my book.  But it was not to be.

Jesus may have said where two or more are gathered, I am there.  Well, He must be the one that starts up all these conversations with me and whoever I am near because in my case  where I am gathered with just one other human being, there is chatting.

Yesterday my reading was interrupted by a delightful older woman who was getting her toes done following a lengthy hospital stay.  She complained a little about her back hurting.  I asked her why she’d been in the hospital.  To have a portion of her lung removed due to cancer she replied.  Well, I suppose that would hurt a bit.

Once the door had been cracked open; out poured her story.  She’d moved here about twenty years ago from Levittown, PA to help out with grandchildren, one of whom had some type of special needs.  She’s happy here; loves the area and is saddened by the amount of growth she has seen over the years. Aside from caring for her family, she worked for about ten year at the Greene County Senior Center.

I asked her if she had any further treatments ahead.  Nope, she’d already told her doctors; no chemo, no radiation.  She wants to spend whatever time she has left on her own, with her family and not strapped into a schedule of medical procedures.  Being on the receiving end of care was difficult for her, but she was really contented with her bright pink toes.

So oodles of thanks to the Russian immigrant who invented invented the pedicure spa chair in his garage in 1985.  According to Wikipedia there were 50,000 nail spas in the US in 2000; as of 2010 the number has doubled.  Personally I am thankful to live within walking distance from two salons.  I know that if I had to walk, my feet would be rewarded for the effort.

Fourth of July – Smalltown America Celebrates

As Fourth of July celebrations go, ours was pretty special this year.  It had been a tough week for the citizens of Greene County.  Last Friday night’s wind storm caused so much damage to the electrical grid that many didn’t have power by Wednesday and according to this morning’s news, are still without power today.  This past week has been dangerously hot and for many of the folks living out in the “hollers” no power means no water as well.

Independence Day was fore-casted to be another hot one, with temperatures climbing close to 100 degrees.  Despite the heat, both sides of the parade route in downtown Standardsville were lined with celebrators dressed in red, white and blue.

The parade was modest; consisting mostly of local fire and rescue squads, the sheriff’s office, service groups like the scouts and Ruritan, antique cars and tractors and an assortment of “Misses'” riding in convertibles.  Most “floats” tossed candy out to the little ones lining the curbs while one smart group offered popsicles and I gladly accepted!  Sadly there were no bands.  I spoke to Donna Richardson, one of the parade organizers and she said they’re working on it for next year.

Following the parade, the crowd was invited to join the VFW on the Greene County courthouse lawn for the raising of the flag and pledge.   There, on the tiny lawn lined by a white picket fence decorated with red, white and blue bunting, the festivities continued.  Both political parties had booths offering refreshment; the Republicans handed out slices of watermelon while the Democrats offered cold bottles of water along with their various bumper stickers, lawn signs and other campaign paraphernalia for the November election.  A portable stage sat at the far edge where the Green County Singers entertained the crowd with a selection of patriotic songs including a medley of the armed service hymns.  I have to admit that I still get goose bumps when I hear “Anchors Aweigh!”

The festivities concluded with the ringing of the courthouse bells.  It was a loud, deep bell, that I’m certain has been atop that building for more than one hundred and fifty years.  As it rang out, those who were veterans of these celebrations rang hand bells they’d brought with them. Daytime fireworks were shot off from the back field as the bells rang.  The bells and the booms were a wonderful reminder of the freedom we enjoy was Americans, the unity we feel in pride of our nation whatever our political beliefs and the cost of that freedom. Yes, it was a modest celebration, but so very rich in the essence of American tradition.  Being there and experiencing this simple grassroots event was so very special.  I can’t wait for next year!

It’s Good to be Home

We’ve been back for three days and aside from a few more loads of wash to go (an the dreaded ironing) we are pretty much back in our home routine.  The lawns have been mowed, the frig has been restocked (although not in that order) and Andy has again headed back to UCSD to teach a couple of semesters.  It’s just Dave and I and the “girls” here and life is good.

We’d planned on having a nice family dinner on Sunday to send Andy off on his trip.  But, life doesn’t always stay on a plan.  Our first challenge was in getting Andy’s car to start.  He didn’t drive it that much while he was staying with us and due to a lack of income, tended not to put much gas in the tank unless going on a trip.  The combination of hot summer weather, a minimal amount of fuel in the tank and inactivity did not make the poor old Honda inclined to start on the first turn of the key, or second or third either.  The men folk leaned under the open hood of the car, inspecting stuff and it was determined that a new battery was in order.

After a quick trip to Walmart and new battery installed, Andy put the key in the ignition hoping that would do the trick.  Voila; no change.  He kept at it, letting it rest between tries until the engine finally turned over and began to run.  Quickly, he jumped back into the car and drove off to fill the tank.  Victory!

Maggie said she would be arriving a little after five however she called just before five to say she was just heading out the door.  Dinner would be delayed.  Regrouping, we started the charcoal a little later than first planned and just put the chicken on the grill when she called again.  She was pulled over on the interstate just about twenty miles from the exit because the temperature gauge in her car registered her engine overheating – no steam, no check engine light, just a high reading on the gauge.

Although I sometimes complain that Dave isn’t always quick to lend a hand, when it comes to stuff like this, he is a champ.  Handing me the tongs and basting brush, he changed his shirt and left to rescue Maggie.

Knowing that your child is stopped in a car on the shoulder of an Interstate is a stressful experience.  For me it is especially nerve wracking because we lost my Uncle Bob and Aunt Chloe a few years ago when they were stopped on the road.  It was early on a Saturday morning, there was very few cars on the road and the weather was clear.  Nonetheless, a young man who fell asleep at the wheel went off the road hitting and killing them both.    Because of this the danger is real to me.  Being able to call her every few minutes on her cell phone made us both feel better, but obviously would provide no protection from a vehicle coming at her.

Meanwhile, here at the house, the chicken was cooking and Andy was packing up his car.

After about an hour, Dave called.  He’d put some oil in her car and they were heading to the exit.  A few minutes later he called back saying the car was still overheating.  After some deliberation, Maggie decided to call for a tow.  They would be delayed a while longer

Back at the ranch, Andy and I decided to eat dinner so he could stick to his schedule and leave on time.  Instead of the family dinner I’d planned, with all four us around the table, Andy and I sat with our plates on the coffee table, eating our chicken while watching Mythbusters.  After dinner, he loaded the last of his belonging into his car, kissed me goodbye.

About an hour later, Dave and Maggie walked through the door.  Maggie was wiped out.  While they were filling out the drop out form at the garage they witnessed a head on collision on the road fronting the station.  I think that seeing and hearing the crash was a vivid reminder of just how lucky she’d been.

So, a day and a half later, Maggie’s car is out of the shop and she is on vacation with her friend Allie.  Her temperature gauge had died.  Andy just texted me that he and his friend Justin have just arrive in San Diego.  His trip went well but now his check engine light is on.

As for me, I got up early, went to Lowe’s, rescued some “reduced” plants and spent the better part of the morning weeding and planting.  We are enjoying a cool day and the windows are open.  Except for the hum of the laundry equipment, the house is quiet.

What more can I ask for?

Life is a Beach

 

Seth and Caleb on the beach at Kitty Hawk.
Seth and Caleb on the beach at Kitty Hawk.

This past week Dave and I have been enjoying the wonders of North Carolina’s Outer Banks with Bonnie, Jim, Seth and Caleb along with Jim’s mother Marianne and niece Valerie.  It is a tradition we have celebrated for just about five years, give or take.  Each year Bonnie scopes out the available houses in our price range, narrows the field down to two or three and we vote on which house will be our beach home for the week.

In the past our vacations have been at the end of August, when the rates dip just before Labor Day.  Two years ago we stayed in a beautiful home called “Rose Cottage”; a sumptuous ocean front manse with multiple levels and lots of living area.  Two wide decks lined the back of each floor overlooking the pool and hot tub and ocean over the dune line.  Sadly our time was cut short by the approach of Hurricane Earl and we had to evacuate.  Earl wasn’t as big and bad as feared and because we all lived close by we were able to return the next day and pick up where we left off.

Last year the Berrymans vacationed in Disneyworld and we moved to Charlottesville so our beach trip didn’t happen.  Not wanting to run the risk of facing another evacuation, we decided to come down here earlier in the hurricane season.  Prices being higher, and ocean front homes like Rose Cottage way out of our price range, this year’s house is just a little further south, off the beach but backing up to the Cape Hatteras National Seashore.

Sunset from the Crow's Nest overlooking Hatteras National Seashore
Sunset from the Crow’s Nest overlooking Hatteras National Seashore

This year’s home, “Kinsale”, is lovely but lacks sufficient living space for eight people to spread out.  While there are multiple decks as well as a crow’s nest, the one great room can get pretty loud in the evenings when competition erupts between conversations and the TV.

Fortunately we don’t spend the majority of our time indoors.  With a beach access handily located across the street, we form a daily caravan of towel bearing beach beasts with cart in tow carrying a variety of chairs, boogie boards, umbrella and sand engineering equipment.  Once our encampment is established, Seth begins his shell hunt, Caleb heads for the water and the rest of us plop in our chairs to nap or read.

After some time in the sun and we are too hot to take the sun any longer, we pad down to the water. Shyly, we allow the first waves to tickle our toes.  Then, after a few seconds of easing into the surf, a wave will break on us, wetting us down in preparation for full wave riding.  Sucking in our breath as our warm blooded bodies adapt to the colder ocean temperature, we are ready to go.

I am not a great swimmer, but I there are few things in this world I enjoy more than bobbing in the waves.   When I am in the ocean, it is as if all the times I’ve jumped into a wave are rolled into one.  I am no longer Monica, “middle aged woman closer to sixty than I ever imagined”, I am “just Monica”, ageless and content, weightless and at peace.   I’m not sure how long I can last out in the surf because I always go back in when my buddies do, but I know that I’m not really ready to go.  I’m left wanting more.

Caleb, Monica and Dave in the surf

Today is our last day here.  It is a day of gathering together our belongings which have spread throughout this house making it our home this week.  Following a morning dip, we will head over to Manteo for lunch.  Tomorrow morning we will wake early, pack up our cars and head home.  It has been a great week and has passed so quickly.  I’m not sure I’m really ready to go home yet. Again, I’m left wanting more.

DAve profile cropped

The Coffee Files

Why is it so satisfying to open a new can of coffee; to hear the air rush in as the vacuum seal is broken releasing the long captured aroma?  Even if you aren’t a coffee drinker, you have to admit there are few things in life that smell so good as coffee brewing.

Instant coffee was the first thing I learned to make in the kitchen.  I remember feeling great pride as a young child, probably eight or nine, being able to put the kettle on all by myself and then carefully pour the hot water into the mug on top of the precisely measured crystals.  Dad took a teaspoon of sugar and a bit of milk in his, Mom drank hers black.  After stirring each cup to insure all ingredients were dissolved, I would carry the cups one by one to my parents.  At least that’s how I remember it.

Memory is a funny thing.  I think of my memory as a huge group of filing drawers.  Most of the time memories are filed properly, some times there are misfilings and other times I guess the memory was just dropped on the floor or went out with the trash.  In any case, something as simple as the smell of coffee can open a variety of drawers and memories come flooding out.

Some Sunday mornings when I was a kid, we’d go to my Grandma Gray’s house after Mass.  My Dad worked most Sundays and took the car with him so one of the aunts or uncles would swing by, pick us up and take us to church and then occasionally to Grandmas afterwards.  We kids liked going to Grandma Gray’s because my youngest aunt and uncles were around our age and with the four, and then five of us and the three of them, there was plenty to do.

Grandma Gray had a percolator which we kids found utterly fascinating.  We would stand by the counter to watch the brown brew bubble up into the glass bulb at the top as the air was filled with the rich coffee aroma.  As long as we were on our best behavior, we were allowed to stay in the kitchen and sit at the table with the grown-ups.  Trouble makers were banished to the basement where the real mischief began.  And, in the world of kid injustice, all it took was one bad apple and the banishment was inclusive. Protesting but compliant, the troop of us would head down the stairs.

Just thinking about Grandma’s basement brings back the clomping sound of our feet on the linoleum covered steps with steel edges.  The heaviest of us weighed about fifty pounds but when we raced up and down those stairs we sounded like the cavalry charging.  One of the steps was missing a back, perfect for someone to lie in wait to ambush and grab the ankles of an unsuspecting soul coming down the stairs.

Despite the stern warnings from above of “someone’s going to get hurt!”, I don’t remember anyone actually getting hurt.  We would run through the basement, thump on the yellowed keys of the old piano and watch cartoons on the old cabinet television with the mysterious mouse turd that lay between the glass and picture tube.  It was a childhood wonderment that inspired many hypotheses on how the mouse was able to squeeze into that space and leave his calling card.

When one of us felt especially daring we would quietly go upstairs, stealthy pass the adults and enter the bathroom, carefully shutting the door behind us as to not attract attention.  Once inside, we’d open the laundry chute, peek down to make sure the hamper was aligned properly and then wiggle feel first into the shaft and slide the short ride to the basement.  This usually only worked for one person because no matter how careful or quiet the second kid was, the grown-ups were somehow tuned into the fact we were sliding down the laundry chute; which was not allowed.  Whether it was the reception of giggles and hoots when the first “laundranaut” hit the hamper or the realization that a second kid was heading into the bathroom when the first had not come out (not a good thing for many reasons) that sounded the alarm, I’m not sure but generally the chute riding was a short lived activity.

Other times, on days when the energy level was lower and we weren’t banished to the basement, I’d love to sit at the kitchen table with the grown-ups.  There was always so much laughter.  In their own, grownup way, they were just as full of mischief as us kids.  They would share stories about something they’d seen, a quipping comment or two would follow and then as they say in the movie listings, “hilarity ensued”.  Around the table the comments flew, each person challenging the rest of the group to come up with something better until at last, the ulitmate quip was spoken reducing the rest of the group to laughter and tears and sending many to the bathroom pronto to avoid embarrassment.  To laugh until you wet yourself was not a rarity in our family.

Well, it’s time to leave Grandma’s house.  My coffee cup is empty and there are chores to be done.  I’m glad I opened that new can of coffee today.  I wonder what will happen when I open the new jar of mayo.

Reworking the Nest

Our nest is empty again.

Early Friday morning I dropped Andy and Amy off at the Greyhound station; the first step in their adventure in moving Amy to Brooklyn for the summer.  I then began the first step in my new adventure; beginning the second wave of sorting and clearing, rearranging and cleaning – more refining of the nest since our move last July.

Settling into a house takes some time.  After a while some of the initial decisions of where things should go seem off kilter.  I’ve already rearranged the kitchen cabinets a couple of times and am planning another go around in the near future.  Like my garden, my cabinets and closets are in constant need of weeding, to let go of some of the stuff.

My first chore this week was to transform my office from a clutter dumping ground into a comfortable workspace that invites and inspires me to settle in and write.  I’m almost there but even now, as I drift off into my next thought, I can see the bookshelves need straightening and dusting.  The real question is, do I really feel the need to clean or am I just looking for a distraction?

Distraction won out.  I just spent the last hour clearing, moving, dusting and replacing everything from the two bookshelves.  I hung a small knickknack shelf Dave made in middle school and have filled it with some small things, formerly known as clutter.  Properly placed on the shelves they are now memorabilia.  The view from my desk is much more appealing.

I could easily write something if I could think of anything to say.  So, I guess for now I’ll have to wait for the inspiration to hit me.  When it does, the office will  be ready!

Once Upon a Mattress

Here it is Wednesday morning and I’m finally sitting down to unpack the holiday weekend’s events.  This past week it has been difficult to find quiet place to sit and think.  Andy’s girlfriend Amy is visiting so I now have two graduate students in residence.  Their “quiet” study pervades almost every area of the house.  A friend used the analogy of an inert gas – filling every possible space.  So true.  But, on the flip side, it’s nice to have them here.

Back to the weekend…. Saturday morning we were up and on the road to Richmond by 8:30 to pick up a full sized mattress and box spring from Maggie and Jan.  They just upgraded to a queen and we wanted to replace the twin bed in the little guest room.  My how times have changed that I simply accept the opportunity of free bedding while totally disregarding the fact that my daughter is purchasing bedding with a man who is not her husband.  Our life is not a perfect one, but nonetheless, it is a good one.

With the mattress and foundation securely bungeed to the top of the CRV, we headed home.  We decided to return on US 33 instead of the interstate to avoid the holiday traffic.  Dave said he’d have a less anxious ride if he didn’t have to concern himself with driving 70 mph with a load on the roof.  The idea sounded good to me since I love travelling the back roads.  Besides, we had the Garmin with us so even if we took a wrong turn (which was really not a risk since we were staying on US 33 the entire way).

Rural Virginia is beautiful.  This spring especially we’ve had plenty of rain so the fields are green and lush and the flowers plentiful.  Long stretches of the highway are lined with post and rail fences portioning off tidy farms with rolling hills dotted with horses and cattle.  Every once in a while we’d see an old charmer, an ancient salt box farm house, greyed and drooping in a field, a reminder of those who travelled the road before us.

Dave and I really enjoy these drives together.  Sometimes the solitude prompts deep conversation but other times, like this one, we simply enjoy the quiet together.  Since the CRV doesn’t have a satellite radio and the reception in Central Virginia is localized and sketchy at best, the only sounds in the car were road sounds and the occasional thump when the breeze caught under the box spring on the roof.  At each thump, we’d peek at the side mirrors, reassure each other that the load was secure and drive on.

We passed through several small towns, including Louisa, one of the towns hit hardest by last summer’s earthquake.  The signs of the towns trauma were evident; Thomas Jefferson Elementary School condemned and surrounded by a security fence and down the road an ante bellum brick manse with scaffolding securing both chimneys.  Despite these challenges, the main street was lined with flags and patriotic decorations in preparation for the towns’ Memorial Day celebration.  They too, overlooked the imperfections and celebrated what was good in their lives.

Our trip on the back roads took about half an hour longer than taking the interstate.  The extra thirty minutes spent was well worth the quiet time together.  I don’t know if we’ll go that way every time we head to Richmond, but if the weather is fine and we’ve got the time, that’ll be the way to go.

A Shuttering Experience

Following a storm a couple of months ago, we discovered that a shutter had been blown off the front of the house and into the front yard.  Several weeks later we picked up the shutter bolts and Lowe’s and after many subsequent Saturday mornings of my asking if we were going to hang the downed shutter, we finally got to it this past weekend.

It’s not that hanging a shutter is such a difficult task.  We’ve had to rehang a couple of them on the lower windows.  The challenge in this particular case was the fact that this shutter required getting onto the porch roof.  Although Dave is not afraid of heights per ce, he is not too keen on climbing a ladder and then transferring to the roof.  A while ago I suggested he climb out a bedroom window onto the roof.  That seemed so much easier than taking out the extension ladder and wrestling it into place so the task was moved up the queue.  We gathered our tools and headed upstairs to the guest room.

Our window are tilt-out thermopane but not exactly like those we’ve had before.  These windows apparently don’t come out of their frames like those we’re accustomed to and the screens seemingly wouldn’t come out unless the window did.  We jiggled and wiggled our window and screen for about twenty minutes before admitting defeat.  Down to the garage we went with the shutter and our tools to get out the extension ladder.

After wrestling the ladder into place, Dave cautiously climbed to the roof with his bag of tools in hand.  He tossed the bag onto the roof and surveyed his approach.

“I don’t think I can get there from here.” he said.

“Should we try to extend the ladder more?”  I asked.

“OK”

So we wrestled the ladder down again, extended it to its maximum height and propped it up against the house.  Again he climbed to the top.  Still not satisfied, he came back down and began to walk around to the front of the house in search of a better angle of approach.

Meanwhile, the fact we couldn’t get the screen out of the upstairs window out was still gnawing at me so I went back upstairs to revisit the problem.  Dave came to join me and finally, after a few anxious moments, we discovered that the screen could be easily removed from the top if the window was just tilted out a bit.  Hooray!

With the screen out, Dave could easily climb out and attach the shutter – except for the fact that the bag of tools was still sitting on the far end of the porch roof from his first trip up the ladder.  So, after climbing the ladder one last time, Dave retrieved the tool bag and returned to complete the task.  After a couple of minutes, the shutter was rehung, the screen replaced and our job complete except for having to return to the driveway and wrestle the extension ladder back to the ground and compact it for storage.

The total time of the job was about ninety minutes – most of which involved figuring out how to remove the screen and wrestling with the ladder.

Later that afternoon, we were chatting with our neighbors over the fence.

“We finally got that shutter up”.  I said.

“It was easy, just climbed out onto the roof from the window.”  Dave said.

“How did you get the screen off?” they asked, “We tried for a long time last week when I was power washing the house but never could figure it out.”

First Anniversary

Today marks the first anniversary of my blog.  To recap; since last May I have returned to the life of a domestic engineer, bought and sold a house, moved across the state, began working out with a personal trainer, welcomed my son home for an extended visit, provided respite to many weary travellers, was elected to the HOA board, and adopted a kitten.  It has been a full year that’s for certain.

You’d think that with so much change in my life I’d be struggling for an identity.  On the contrary, from the moment we arrived up here, I’ve felt at home. Perhaps it’s because the rural landscape is similar to the rolling hills of Western New York where I was born (although there were no mountains on the horizon) or just the slower pace of life but for whatever the reason, life here is good.

The struggle to discover who I am and what I should be is gone.  I know who I am and I am me.   That is enough.  I’ve just about completed the LifeKeys program and discovered that for the most part, I am using the gifts God gave me in a manner that is authentic to my values and personality.  In the end, my epiphany is exactly like Dorothy Gale’s when she returned from Oz; there is no place like home and nothing more important than family.  Be it blood or loci familia, it’s all about people, connecting and staying connected.

Hopefully Monica Chronicles has helped me stay closer to many folks I care deeply about.  Guaranteed there are more adventures in life to come.

Oh What a Beautiful Morning!

The past couple of days have been what I consider perfect.  The air temperature is cool and dry, the sky is blue, the birds are singing in the trees!

Yesterday, fueled by a poached egg for breakfast, I became a dynamo of activity, accomplishing as many tasks as I generally get done in a week.  I did everything!  I mowed, I ironed, I baked, and finally transplanted the herbs I started in window boxes.

I told Lorenzo the other day that I had an epiphany last weekend when I was digging out the bed for my herbs.  I was hot and sweaty but kept going anyway.  My “ah ha” moment was the realization that before going into training, I used to think that when my heart started racing and I began to sweat, it was time to stop working.  Now I know it means I’m burning off the fat.

So, if my blogs seem fewer and lighter than they have been, I’m out back working up a sweat and hopefully, next time you see me, there will be less of me!

Have a great day!